How to connect with your teen son when he’s splitting away

This doesn’t require deep psychoanalysis; to shed light on your intentions, try having a “walk and talk” with yourself. Are you afraid of losing him because you checked out of your family around the same age? Do you want to connect because you’re worried about his friend group? Do you want to connect to be able to communicate about his schoolwork or chores? Your reasons don’t have to be crystal clear, but I have found that, when parents try to connect with their teens out of neediness or fear, they create unintended struggles, pain and miscommunication. Before you do anything, please clarify your “why.”